Love Petting Your Dog? There's Something You Should Know And We Hope You're Prepared For This

Some things go perfectly together: Peanut butter and jelly. He-Man and She-Ra. Netflix and chill. And... dogs and petting, right?

Not necessarily.

Believe it or not, thats what we Raj Punjabi and Noah Michelson, the co-hosts of HuffPosts Am I Doing It Wrong?  podcast learned when we recently chatted with Dr. Emily Levine, a board-certified veterinary behaviorist and the owner of Animal Behavior Clinic of New Jersey.

Many dogs really dont find being pet and hugged and kissed particularly nice they just dont enjoy it very much, she told us.

There are some dogs dont get me wrong that love a good butt scratch or when you first come home or they havent seen you in a while, because theyre so excited to see you, that may mask how they really feel about it... but when you really watch a dogs body language when theyre hanging out and doing their own thing, most of them are just tolerating [being petted] at best. There are lots of dogs where, quite frankly, they get so frustrated and annoyed that they start to growl and say Hey, please, back off! Im really not enjoying this.

Of course lots of furry friends do seem to enjoy physical affection, but if were dealing with a dog who doesnt seem particularly enthused about it, should we refrain from doing it?

This is where we have a little bit of a culture clash human culture and dog culture. We have dogs... we love them... and I would say if theyre tolerating it, and as long as theyre not aggressing or its [not] making them very anxious tail tucked, ears back if theyre tolerating it, its a little bit like hugging your kid, especially as they become more a teenager, you know? Sometimes its like, youre just going to hug them and kiss them and they just have to put up with it. So I dont think its a terrible thing to pet and hug and kiss your pet if they tolerate it.

So when shouldnt we be doing it?

If it clearly makes them anxious or it theyre using aggression as a strategy to say, STOP, Dr. Levine said. If we ignore the early signs the growl, lets say then the dogs sometimes feel they have to escalate their message. Fair enough, because we arent getting it.

Dr. Levine noted that hugging in particular can make dogs feel suffocated, so she suggested some alternative physical expressions of affection that might be better appreciated by your pet.

[You can pet] the cheek and the chin... probably avoiding going along down the back... and you can keep it brief, too, she said. Prioritizing the quality of your interactions over quantity might be the approach to take.

Its a relationship we have with our dogs theres always give and take so as long as [petting] is not the only thing you ever do with your dog, lets make sure theyre getting time to play, or getting time to do things they find enjoyable.

So how do we determine what our dogs want or dont want? Dr. Levine advised that our best bet is to look at their body language.

Theyre constantly telling us how they feel. We just have to learn how to read it. Were not born knowing that no dog owner should feel guilty about not knowing how to read their dog. But there are lots of resources body language videos and other resources where you can learn how they are communicating ... Its the best thing really that a dog owner can do, to really get to know their dog, learn how they speak, because theyre speaking all the time.

We also chatted about the one thing every pet owner should do while walking their dog, whether or not its safe for a dog to sleep with us in our bed and much more.

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