Do not mess with Barbara should be an obvious rule on ABCs hit sitcom Abbott Elementary. But somehow, Janines not very bright ex, Tariq (Zack Fox), learns this the hard way in a HuffPost exclusive sneak peek of the shows new episode, Gregorys Garden Goofballs, airing Wednesday night. (Watch the clip above.)

In the clip, Tariq returns to Abbott and surprises Barbara (Sheryl Lee Ralph ), the schools veteran kindergarten teacher, by claiming a student in her class is his son. But in typical Tariq fashion, its not really the truth. He has only been dating the students mother for, like, seven weeks. That doesnt stop him from declaring that technically, Im stepdaddy right now.

Take your presumably sticky hands off of my student, an annoyed Barbara tells Tariq.

You mean, take my definitely sticky hands off of my son, Tariq responds, while the student glares at him in confusion.

To quote Maury Povich, you are not the father, Barbara says.

Barbara keeps schooling Tariq throughout the clip, like when he nonsensically decides the kid is named Tariq Jr. (That is not his name, Barbara says) and when she catches Tariq stealing Play-Doh on his way out of her classroom.